I listened to a recent podcast about essentials for trust from Henry Cloud with Ed Stetzer & Daniel Yang. I found the podcast timely and recommend you listen on your favorite platform, or also see below video (LINK). The podcast was based from his book “Trust: Knowing When To Give It, When To Withhold It, How To Earn It, And How To Fix It When It Gets Broken.”

Overall, I valued the podcast enough that I purchased the book, and created some summary notes below.

• Trust is cultivated through the process of understanding. If we believe people want to understand us, then we will be willing to give not just of our time but our very selves.
  
  “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” Proverbs 18:13

• Trust is continued through understanding motivations. If we believe people value us for who we are, and not just what we can do for them, then we will be willing to be generous and sacrificial with our responses.

• Trust is bolstered with confident competency. Having the right objectives and aims are essential for effective production, but so is having the proper abilities. Life is too important and ministry too essential to excuse poor stewardship or lacking aim for excellence to God’s glory.  

• Trust is sustained with character. If we believe in truth, then integrity and honesty are non-negotiable. When a person’s competency outpaces their character, then everyone will reap the consequences.

• Trust creates a track-record. While Christians are to forgive failed actions and mistaken behaviors, offensive patterns must be held accountable. Past performances does have weight upon future results.  

How to grow after betrayal.

• Forgiveness is always possible because of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Unforgiveness enslaves.
• Jesus told Peter that he would fail. Yet, Jesus also promised that Peter would be strengthened and used according to God’s purposes. The NT evidence of Peter’s comeback after his betrayal reveals the growth of one’s character from one who experienced God’s saving grace.
• Jesus told the Pharisees they neglected the weightier matters of the law. So, some betrayals have greater consequences.
• Forgiveness is about the past, but trust is about the future. Forgiveness is about one person, but reconciliation takes two.
• Returning after betrayal is possible, but that doesn’t mean that you return with blind trust.
• Truth doesn’t automatically erase trauma. Jesus said, “the truth will set you free,” but He began that statement about those who are “abiding in His teachings.” This is true for the offender and the offended. Freedom comes through following Jesus’ teachings of truth and love.
• Betrayal festers in isolation but heals within a body. If you’ve experienced betrayal, one of the best benefits is to connect with a healthy church family.