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I have had 8 vehicles…

Each have shown my lack of self-control. The last several years has tested me to not trade in another vehicle… but the reality of adding 1-2 more swiftly on the way drivers has aided my patience in some ways, and in other ways has exhausted it : )

Today we reflect on the 9^th & last fruit of the Spirit. This series has been both challenging and encouraging. Personally, it’s challenged me bc none of these fruit characteristics come natural. Not even pastors or any Christian has an edge on being more holy; we deal with the same temptations and selfishness that everyone else does. Being a Christian is not about living flawless but living forgiven with growth in grace.

So, while the fruit of the Spirit has challenged me, this study has also encouraged me. It has reminded me that the Holy Spirit does not give up on us. God keeps pursuing and pruning us, so that we honor Jesus and also so that we are fruitful for the good of others. The image that should come to mind is an upside-down tree – with roots deep in heaven and abundant fruit on earth.

Our hope in spending 9 weeks in this series is that we set our hope on things above, so that when the earth shakes our trees, we are unharmed but those around us are helped.

EXAMINE        Self-Control            GALATIANS 5       

¹³ For you were called to freedom, brothers
[and sisters]. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another. ¹⁴ For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
¹⁵ But if you bite and devour one another, watch out that you are not consumed by one another. ¹⁶ But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. ¹⁷ For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. ¹⁸ But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. ¹⁹ Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, ²⁰ idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, ²¹ envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. ²² But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³ gentleness, SELF-CONTROL; against such things there is no law. ²⁴ And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. ²⁵ If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit. ²⁶ Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.

Biblical Definitions

Aw-tsar (עָצָר) = Used 50+x and is translated as “prevent” or “restrain”, or something being “checked.” The implication is to slow or stop something before it overwhelms.
Pr 25:28 “A person without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.”

Egkratia (ἐγκράτεια) = Used 4x and uses a word (kratos) that’s used frequently meaning: strength, power, or dominion. So, this word implies self-discipline and spiritual growth accomplished in a person’s life to resist worldly desires or fleshly practices that contrast the Lordship of Jesus. Overall, self-control results in sound judgment.[1]

Self-control is the final fruit, and perhaps the fulfilment of all the others that help us to “keep in step with the Spirit” (Gal 5:25). Self-control also has a profound and startling reality: there’s an internal presence that needs to be restrained. The desires of the flesh are against the Spirit… these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do.

So, self-control is life-long pursuit; our earthly life will never graduate from needing to have it.

Self-control is a life-long pursuit. Our earthly life will never graduate from needing to have it.

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It’s for females

1 Tim 2:9 “women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with extravagant jewelry or costly attire”

It’s for men – both older & young

Titus 2:2, 6 “Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness… Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled”

It’s for single and married
1 Cor 7:9 “If you cannot exercise self-control, you should marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”

It’s for every Christian
1Cor 9:25 “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things to receive a perishable wreath, but [Christians do so to inherit] an imperishable reward.”

2 Tim 1:7 “God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power, and love, and self-control”

It’s for church leadership
1 Tim 3:2 “an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, soberminded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach”

For those who want to endure through the end times
1 Pet 4:7 “The end of all things is at hand; therefore be self-controlled and sober-minded”

Peter describes the faith journey in a comparable passage saying, “make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
But whoever does not have them is nearsighted and blind, forgetting that they have been cleansed from their past sin” (2 Pet 1:5-9).

We started this series asking: If it were a crime to be a Christian, would there be overwhelming evidence of the fruit of the Spirit to convict you of being guilty?

Let’s look at a passage that is the exact opposite – how a person’s life appears w/o self-control, or any other fruit of the Spirit.

2 Samuel 11 ¹ In the spring of the year, the time when kings go out to battle, David sent [his men, but he stayed home in Jerusalem].
One of the first signs of lacking self-control is unfocused time. This simple decision of staying home instead of staying active in kingdom priorities became a giant misstep that would haunt his life forever. This is a reminder to be mindful of our natural tendencies during both leisure and stress, so that we are good stewards of our time.
*Eph 5:15-16 “Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making good use of your time, because the days are evil.”
 

² It happened, late one afternoon, when David arose from his couch and was walking on the roof of the king’s house, that he saw from the roof a woman bathing; and the woman was very beautiful. ³ And David sent and inquired about the woman. And one said, “Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?”

Another evidence of lacking self-control is unrestrained lust. David’s glance became a gaze for desire and entitlement. As one believer said, “We can’t prevent a bird pecking in our hair, but we can prevent it from building a nest.” Yet, David permitted lust to build a headquarters inside his heart. After David’s inquiry, he found out she was married. Remember: David was a husband, a father, and a king. Each of these roles should have caused him to be more disciplined. Sadly, sin spiraled, and his family and the nation paid the consequences.  

Imagine a soldier going into battle with the aim of not getting hit very much! It’s the same mindset for those who think they cannot have any boundaries or are immune to lust.
*Eph 5:3 “There must not even be a hint of sexual impurity among you”
Sadly, many flirt with impurity instead of leaving it at the cross to be nailed and crucified.

• Porn is not a treat, it’s a trap.
• Adultery is not an accident; it’s result of permitted inappropriate actions

⁴ So David sent messengers and took her, and she came to him, and he lay with her. Then she returned to her house. ⁵ And the woman conceived, and she sent and told David, “I am pregnant.”

David had complete disregard for self-control and chose unashamed immorality.[2] He betrayed his own marriage; trampled on the hearts of his children; defiled the marriage of Uriah & Bathsheba; and disrespected his position as king of Israel – not to mention broke the heart of God.

⁶ So David sent word to Joab, “Send me Uriah the Hittite.” And Joab sent Uriah to David. ⁷ When Uriah came to him, David asked how Joab was doing and how the people were doing and how the war was going. ⁸ Then David said to Uriah, “Go down to your house and wash your feet.” And Uriah went out of the king’s house, and there followed him a present from the king. ⁹ But Uriah slept at the door of the king’s house with all the servants of his lord, and did not go down to his house.

We’ll stop at verse 9, but you know the rest – David tries to get Uriah to be with his wife to cover his relations with Bathsheba. However, Uriah is dedicated to his king’s mission with the highest integrity. Sadly, at this moment, David’s integrity was shallow and like Jello – easily falling apart! BTW for those who don’t know: Jello is not real fruit!

David was indulging the works of his flesh, and nothing would stop him from attempting to cover his tracks. He tried getting Uriah drunk to go home to Bathsheba – but that didn’t work. David’s unabashed deceit would lead to unregretted murder, and an overall desensitization of his spiraling sin.

Ephesians 3:18-19 “Those that do not follow God harden their hearts; [they lose] sensitivity; they give themselves over to sensuality, so as to indulge their own pleasure.”
Proverbs 20:17 “Bread gained by deceit is sweet, but afterward their mouth is filled with gravel.”

“Sin will take you father than you want to go, keep you longer than you want to stay, and cost you more than you’re willing to pay.”

APPLY/TAKEAWAY

Self-control is multifaceted and involves a wider and deeper perspective than mere sexuality. The human experience is sexual but that should not be what defines a person – sadly, that has become the essence of 21^st century identity. So, in our final application, I want to explore self-control in our senses, our speech, and our spending.

Control our senses.

Scripture exhorts us to “glorify God with our body” (1Cor 6:20), and in everything we do (1Cor 10:13). Our senses involve touch, sight, smell, hearing, and taste. And unfortunately, sin has infected our senses. God created a world that was intended to be pleasing to the eye and strengthening to the body with full enjoyment (Gen 2:9; 1Tim 6:17b).
– – -> Imagine a Gen1-2 world w/o arthritis, glasses or cataracts, hearing aids, funky stink, and food w/o unhealthy calories!  Yet, such is life…

Therefore, self-control of our senses most certainly includes our appetite. Gluttony and obesity are symptoms of greed and pride, thinking we are entitled to have whatever we want. Food and drink become substitute saviors for when we feel stressed or are searching for guidance. Instead of praying to God, we stare at the inside of our refrigerator. Instead of opening our Bibles, we open our pantry cabinet. And while “everything is permissible with food/beverage for the body,” our bodies are made primarily for the Lord’s purpose.

• Don’t write off unhealthy eating as unimportant. Exercise has value to steward our life for the glory of God.

Control our speech.

The destructive potential of our speech is graphically illustrated as a forest fire. Thousands of acres of valuable timber can be devastated by a small spark (cf James 3). Likewise our speech can either enflame trouble or encourage life and hope.[3]

• Pr 10:11 “The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.
• Pr 10:21 “The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for lack of sense.”
• Pr 12:18 “rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

• One of the best ways to influence your speech is to memorize Scripture (Mt 12:34; Ps 119:11).

Control our spending

A third area of self-control is another one we don’t like others pointing out. It’s the struggle against “one more.”[4] The question is asked, “How much is enough?” And wherever we are on the financial spectrum, it’s always “one more.” But, “it is impossible to become a fully developed follower of Jesus without also becoming a fully developed steward of our resources.” (Randy Alcorn). We will either worship our wealth or worship with our wealth.

The keys to controlling our spending and worshiping with our wealth are ABCDE.

• Alignment with God & spouse
  (if not, expect conflict – and lots of it)
• Budgeting
  (failing to plan with your money is planning to fail)
• Credit Cards & Debt are minimal (Pr 22:7; 26-27)
  Discern from depreciating vs appreciating assets)
• Earning an income through work
  (Pr 10:4 laziness = poverty; diligence = protection)

Close[5]

In a Quebec winter of 2006, 41-year old Lydia Angyiou, fought a polar bear and survived. Her two sons were playing ice hockey and she saw the 700-lb polar bear approaching the children. Instinctively, she put herself between the bear and kids and began the fight of her life. Thankfully, other locals who were also hunters, brought their rifle and shot in the air to scare away the bear.

From time to time, we hear stories like this. Women or men carrying out extraordinary acts of self-will. So, if willpower and our body adrenaline are strong enough to fight off polar bears, or lift heavy cars in emergency situations, why are these not the solution to prevent us from midnight snacks, impulsive spending, or worse – falling to seductive pleasures???

Biblical self-control is relying upon the Spirit of God to overcome the presence of the flesh. It’s giving control of yourself to God. Practically, it’s learning to prioritize the spiritually vital more than what is most physically pressuring.

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We stand before God, the only one who exercises perfect self control by not giving us what we deserve… Jesus took on our out of control sin, to crush and conquer it on the cross / so that we can be calmed and at peace – forgiven and enabled to say “no” to things that promise to please but fail to fulfill. The grace of God has appeared, and we wait for our blessed hope in Christ.

[1] More insights from Jerry Bridges, The Practice Of Godliness, p.133. This book is part of a trilogy with The Pursuit Of Holiness, and The Pursuit Of Holiness Bible Study.

[2] Whether David raped Bathsheba is uncertain. Undoubtedly there is an imbalance of power dynamic, yet the whole of Scripture on this topic, and the specific details of the event do not give us certainty the event was rape. See https://www.equip.org/articles/did-david-rape-bathsheba/; https://www.dennyburk.com/did-david-rape-bathsheba/. 

[3] For more clarity of the importance of our words, especially in Proverbs, see: https://growinggodlygenerations.com/2015/03/09/life-in-proverbs-my-words-before-god/

[4] See article by Biblical Counselor Ed Welch.

Self Control: The Battle Against “One More” / Journal Of Biblical Counseling, Volume 19:2 (Winter 2001)

Self-Control – Battle Against One More – Ed WelchDownload

[5] Adapted from https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/cultivate-free-life-self-control/